the emotional arithmetic of paying for intimacy

LI liam_dublin · Ireland, Dublin · · 196 words · 👁 6 views

Sometimes I wonder if my wife knows how lonely a marriage can get. Not the kind of lonely where you're physically apart, but where you're emotionally disconnected. Where conversations become transactional and touch becomes routine.

When I first started seeing escorts, I thought it was purely physical. A transaction. But it's never that simple. Maria, a Brazilian girl I see occasionally in city center, understands something my wife doesn't. She listens. She makes me feel seen in a way that goes beyond physical contact.

I'm not proud of the infidelity. The guilt is real and constant. But there's a raw honesty in these encounters that my marriage lacks. I'm paying for more than sex. I'm paying for understanding, for connection, for a moment where someone is fully present with me.

The economics of this are complicated. I'm not rich, but I budget carefully. Each encounter is a calculated decision. Not just about physical gratification, but about emotional survival. Some months it's a dinner and drinks with an escort. Other months, it's just a brief encounter.

My wife would be devastated if she knew. But would she be more devastated by the sex, or by understanding how emotionally starved I've become?

LI
liam_dublin
Ireland · Member since Jan 2026
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